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Like all of my blogs of late, this blog is directly related to my life. You see, last week and all weekend I had a severe case of the "procrastinations". Have you ever had bouts of that? It's a common "illness" with symptoms such as; switching between facebook and email; shuffling paper; watching tv and so on and so forth. The symptoms look different for each person, however, this fatal "illness" has one thing in common... unfulfilled dreams.

Now to be serious...

Procrastination is actually a symptom. So, like a disease in the human body, if all you are doing is just treating the symptom then you are still left with the disease.  You can look to change things from the outside in (dealing with the symptom) and find plenty of steps on 'how to deal with procrastination'.  Or you can get to root of the cause and look to change from the inside out.

Let me give you an example.  Imagine for a minute you have a chocolate cake and you slice the cake to make 2 cakes to give you a double layered cake. Let's pretend that it is chocolate and you put cream and fresh strawberries in between.. Why?.. simply because I love chocolate cake with cream and strawberries! It has nothing to do with the example.

The bottom layer represents your core belief system. It is made up of all the beliefs that support you in having the successes you have had and all the self-limiting beliefs that stop you from achieving all the other dreams you have yet just can't seem to achieve! The top layer of the cake is the results of your every day actions, including procrastination. They belong together and cannot be separated. After all, it was a chocolate cake that was sliced to make two layers of chocolate cake. You can look to make changes to the top layer, however, it will always be chocolate.

Procrastination (my actions... or lack there of!) is the result of being in resistance to something. I am not talking about the resistance to doing something you don't like or something that is 'hard'. Again, that would just be looking at the surface symptoms. I am referring to looking deeper than that, to the bottom layer of the cake. A personal development facilitator, Tom Haupt discusses in his book, Time-Out!, about the 8 most common self-limiting beliefs that hold us back from our goals and dreams. These are the names of the diseases that are the root cause of why anyone of us procrastinates.

Let's say we look at my layers as an example. I must start with what I see in the top layer.. obviously in this case we are talking about procrastination. So, if procrastination is a form of resistance then what am I resisting? If I look at my bottom layer I can identify that I am afraid of success. So I am actually resisting being successful! According to the 8 categories of the self-limiting beliefs as identified in Tom Haupt's book I have a belief called "Fear of Success" and also "I'm not Worthy".

When I believe that "I'm not worthy" or have a 'Fear of success" then I will look to go about my life, subconsciously, looking to sabotage my dreams to support my beliefs about myself. Procrastination is one really great way that I can sabotage my success. I mean, who can actually be successful in their business by watching tv and spending time on facebook!?

How do we change this chocolate cake to another flavor? ie: how do I change "I'm not worth it" to "I'm worth it"? Well... that's a whole other blog. However, there are some great exercises in Tom Haupt's book. You can order it on his website: www.TomHaupt.com

Next time you are procrastinating take the time to dig down as to what you are resisting. What's really going on for you?

Live a purpose-filled life.. you ARE worthy of it!

I love you

xx Melissa
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I had a girlfriend email me  about how her business is progressing and that she finds that she sometimes lands herself in the midst of feeling anxious and obsessing about how to talk to potential clients about her business.  And of course, like most weeks when I write these blogs it is because I could totally see myself in the same boat! For me I am often 'freaked out' about how many people will come to my events! or not come.. to be more on point!

There are many surface reasons why we find ourselves 'freaking out' about 'who to talk to and how to talk to them ' or about any other aspects of our lives. When we feel these feelings it is because we are outside our comfort zone for a start.

I want to propose this thought...."The underlying reason why we become anxious and stressed could be that we are attaching our worth to the results." I mean why is it that it matters how many women come to my event? Is that a reflection of me? NO! It could have nothing to do with me. Could it be a reflection of how I marketed the event? SURE! However, that has NOTHING to do with ME. Not to do with who I AM anyway. Once we can stand in our power.. in our self-worth and own that who we are is already enough, then we don't need to attach the outcomes to who we are as women (or men). 

So, when you next approach someone about your business, stand in your self-worth - in your power - and while you own who you are, that who you are is already enough irrelevant of the results and detach yourself from the outcome. (Even if the result is a positive one!)

Practice this and share your results for us all to read.

I love you all.

Own your power and your purpose for your life. You deserve it. YOU ARE WORTH IT! :)

xx Melissa
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