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In  the beginning of the book I am writing is a concept of Self-Discovery and it's importance to a woman's success. Identifying who you THINK you are is the foundation for empowerment.  There are some questions in the book that allow the reader to make some discoveries about herself.

With these discoveries there is certainly no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’. Nor is there ‘good’ or ‘bad’. There are only discoveries about what is empowering or disempowering you. What is, is. And what isn’t, isn’t. It is the stories we make up about the circumstances in our lives, that makes the difference between whether we are empowered or disempowered.

When I am referring to empowered I am referring to something that is supporting or promoting your greatness. And therefore disempowered I am referring to something that is not supporting or promoting your greatness.  Being empowered puts you in a responsible state. I once heard Tony Robbins, a very popular and well known identity within the personal growth and development arena, say that being responsible is being “response able”. Meaning when you are in an empowered state you are able to respond. An empowered state allows you to be focused on finding a new solution. Provides you with new understanding. You are more open to learning something new about yourself or a situation. It gives you the power to make decisions and moves you into action mode.

The Webster dictionary defines the word empower as: “To give power to. To enable or permit. To promote the self-actualization or influence of.” Imagine if you gave yourself permission and supported yourself in a consistent place of empowerment? You would be giving yourself permission to enable yourself or to give power to yourself!

Therefore being in a disempowered state is to deprive of power. Webster dictionary defines it as “To deprive of influence, to make weak, ineffectual or unimportant.” When you allow yourself to be in a disempowered state you allow yourself to be made weak. To allow your power to be taken away from you and to be ineffectual and  unimportant.

It focuses you on the problem and even makes the problem bigger. You find yourself in an unresourceful state as you are simply problem focused not solution focused. It puts you in the victim questioning: “why me? Why does this always happen to me?’ Disempowerment gives you a feeling of being out of control because you give away your power.

The stories can be changed. Given that they have been written over a long period of time and become a part of our belief system, it has been said that they will always be with us at some level. That the stories never really go away. They are a part of who we are.

So, before assessing whether the stories in your life leave you empowered, what are the stories? Who are YOU? Who is it that you think you are?

Own your greatness - you deserve it,


Melissa Williams
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